it's funnier when you go back in time

Editor's Note: Hi. I'm the editor. I'm also the writer. I'm also not very bright. I wrote this yesterday and got distracted by a tap-dancing horse and forgot to hit "post." This is REALLY funny if you read it yesterday. Well...maybe not funny...but RELEVANT! Which is almost like funny.

Happy birthday aspirin!

Or, as I like to call it, acetylsalicylic acid!

Well, not "call" it...I guess "sing" it is more accurate.

I once wrote a song in an elevator about acetylsalicylic acid. I was working on a new album based on over-the-counter medicines and I do my best work when I'm taunting gravity.

Would you like to learn the song? It's pretty simple. Just sing "acetylsalicylic acid" over and over again!

I know. It's kinda brilliant. I'm like that.

It is also the 100th birthday of the Oreo cookie! Which is a different kind of medicine. You can buy it over-the-counter, but you should really get the prescription-strength stuff. It's much better for you.

I have no songs for Oreo cookies. I'm sure I could think of one, but I have to go into the elevator for it.

There is a song about sodium, but I didn't write that one. It's still a good song, though.

Maybe I can combine all three. Not to eat. For a song.

Or maybe to eat...hmmm...salt and aspirin Oreo cookies?

That sounds like a tasty number 1 single!

I'm off to ride the elevator.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj