never go against a sicilian when space is on the line

Apparently Sicily has a space program. They sent a cannolo into space.

Let me start of by saying that “cannolo” is the singular version of the pastry-filled tube. “Cannoli” is the plural. I always thought "cannolis" was a real word. It is not.

Also, pastry-filled tube is not the sexiest description of one of nature’s most wonderful creations. But that’s kinda what it is.

Back to the topic! They sent a cannolo into space! Because that’s important! I did not know this, but I guess people seem to have “negative connotations” of the home of the cannoli. (Is that negative cannolotations?)

A few guys decided to give their Sicilian image a positive spin by creating a space program. For $485.45, they sent a cannolo into space. Filmed it. And told the world. Now people won’t make fun of Sicily anymore!

Seriously. This is what they thought would give them a better image. A helium balloon, a “Cannolo Transporter,” a camera, and a cannolo in space. A space pastry. A spastry.

Due to the unstable flakiness of a real pastry-filled tube, they had to create a model of a pastry-filled tube. Also, a model of a cherry-on-top was added for scientific accuracy.

I can see the brochures now. “Come to Sicily! The organized crime isn’t what you should worry about! Worry about pastry-filled tubes falling on your head! We have so many pastry-filled tubes that we just send them into space for funsies! They’re literally out-of-this-world! With a cherry-on-top!”

Now that I think about it…that’s actually really awesome! I want to go there! I just sold myself on the trip!

I should really go into marketing. I’m, like, a genius-filled tube.

Tube is a funny word.

I’m off to fill a tube with pastry. And maybe some gummy bears.

Enjoy everything.

-dj

the proper way to eat a cupcake

I saw something yesterday that told me I was eating cupcakes all wrong.

Here's what you're supposed to do. Rip off the bottom. Put it on top of the frosting. Then eat. So, it's like two "slices" of cupcake with frosting in the middle.

No. That is NOT how you eat a cupcake. THAT is how you eat a whoopie pie. If I wanted a whoopie pie, I WOULD HAVE BOUGHT A WHOOPIE PIE!

Since I bought a cupcake, I will eat it LIKE A CUPCAKE SHOULD BE EATEN! Awkwardly bite it on the top or the side and get frosting on my face. Like it was meant to be!

I'm sorry to get so excited about this, but really, it's unnatural to eat a cupcake like a whoopie pie. THAT is why we make BOTH wonderful pastries!

Cupcake comes  from the words "cup" and "cake." Cup means: hand-held liquid holder. Cake means: fluffy, crumbly goodness topped with frosting.

One day, somebody didn't want to eat a whole cake, so they took their tin cup (in ye olde dayes, everybody had tin cups) and put all the cake ingredients in there. Baked it. Put frosting on it. And the cupcake was born.

That person's neighbor, Mr. Whoopie (the cupcake person's name is lost to history because the pastry is not named after them and if you don't get a pastry named after you, nobody will ever remember who you are), loved cake-food and frosting, but didn't like the mess. So he put frosting in the middle of two cakey items.

Today's lesson: if you want a whoopie pie, get one. If you want a cupcake, get one. If you want to eat your cupcake like a whoopie pie...hang your head in shame.

I'm off to cup my cake and whoopie my pie.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj