cerebral organoids

Everybody loves it when stuff goes "mini." Like, mini versions of ponies and piggies and Kit Kats and M&M's and pancakes.

How about a mini brain? Science has one for you!

How cool is this? They grew a brain! It's technically a cerebral organoid. And no, I'm not making this up even though I watched Doctor Who all weekend and it SOUNDS like I'm talking about the Ood.

These are mini brains that you can bring around with you anywhere you want! They're only 4 millimeters around. Small enough to fit in your pocket!

You thought you phone was smart? Wait until you use your extra brain!

Scientists want to use these cerebral organoids to find out why problems occur in some heads. They can study brains as they develop without your skull getting in the way.

My skull gets in the way of lots and lots of things. Mostly walls and low-hanging metal bars. Sometimes my skull gets in the way of other people, but they have no problem moving it. Aggressively.

It'll be fun to have a mini brain around. Well, fun until they start to grow mini bodies to do their mini evil deeds and take over mini worlds and fly around in mini rockets shooting mini laser guns.

Of course, everything will be so cute when it's mini, that we won't mind the mini hostile takeover! Especially if they make adorable mini otters. THAT would be a cuteness overload!

My brain might literally explode from cuteness. Then I will need to buy a new cerebral organoid to replace the old one.

I could probably fit, like, 10 of these mini ones in my skull. I'd have tons of brains in there! I would probably be able to see in 10 dimensions! 3D movies will just look flat to me! They'll have to go 11D!

Get your cerebral organoids now! Before they become celebrities after starring in Doctor Who.

I'm off to fill my skull.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

the sun sets in my eyes

Do you have a sun visor in your car? I do. I'm pretty sure most cars do. You might use it early in the morning or later in the day when the sun is trying to burn your eyes with its awesomeness.

My visor is pretty good. It can go low enough to help out. It's kinda short, though. Like, to the right. Because if the sun is next to my rearview mirror, it still cooks my brain. I'm thinking of buying some attachment to make it block a wider area.

Or maybe just duct tape some cardboard to the edge. Which would be cheaper and more fun to decorate. I have Sharpies.

As exciting as this whole conversation is (it's really not), I DO have a point. Are you like me and feel like you can’t see anything when your visor is down?

I know it's only blocking my vision of the sky. I can totally still see the road, so why am I so messed up by this? I think the only risk I have is maybe missing a bird flying by or a falling rock or a UFO (which I totally saw last night).

So why do I feel like I'm not seeing anything? I think it's all psychological. Which I think means it's all in my head.  But I am wondering if there is some fact to it.

OH! I heard the other day that stolen cars go to Mexico or overseas all the time. How random is that? Like, living in South Dakota, do you know how long it would take to get to Mexico? Or even get to a boat to go to China or something?!

That's crazy hard. I do NOT have the drive (pun intended) to become a car thief. They will work harder for one car than I'll probably ever work in my whole life. I don't know why they don't just find an easier job. I guess I'm too lazy for that.

And I hate getting the sun in my eyes and that's probably a real work hazard with car thieves.

I'm off to block out the sun.

Enjoy everything.

-dj

you too can be a heart surgeon

Ummm...is this a good idea? A company made a game where you have to perform heart surgery. Like, real heart surgery.

This isn't Operation. The nose doesn't light up. There is no buzz. Just blood. Lots of blood. If you mess up, Bob doesn't make it.

Luckily, Bob isn't an actual person.

The Surgeon Simulator is the next game you give your kids for Christmas! They plan on adding brain surgery and common dentistry, as well!

Kid One: "Hey Billy! Wanna come over and play Brain Surgeon?"

Kid Two: "Whoa! You have a brain that needs surgeoning? I am SO there!

Kid One: "Sweet tooth!

Kid Two: "Speaking of a sweet tooth, any chance we can do some common dentistry, too?"

Kid One: "Does a rib have a cage?! Of course we can you silly willy!"

Kid Two: "Surgical!"

Hopefully this will get kids interested in the medical sciences. Because, as you may or may not know, I love medical science. Since I hope one day they will be able to make me into Astro Boy.

Yeah, I know how he jets around. And I'm totally cool with it.

So bring on the science! And the internal jet packs!

I'm off to surgeon a heart.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

you never think they'll eat you

Crazy scientists always trying to create something that should NEVER exist. And they are doing it again. They have created a "jellyrat." 

Taking the heart of a rat and bio-engineering (I don't know what that word really means, but it sounds "evil scientisty") it to a thin layer of silicone, they have created a jellyfish-like creature.

Wanna know how I found a jellyfish-like creature? I SAW A JELLYFISH AT THE AQUARIUM. We don't need a cyborg rat-heart jellyfish! They already exist!

If these things learns how to jump out of the water and breathe air (Which it will, you know. These things always learn how to evolve.), it looks like it will jump onto your face and SUCK YOUR BRAIN!

I don't know about you, but I need my brain for simple AND complicated tasks. Like walking or holding a fork OR STAYING ALIVE.

So if you feel the city breakin' and everybody shakin', then you know that the jellyrats have started their attack.

Luckily, I know a few beavers from the future who have laser eyes and metal hands and stuff.

They are here to protect the future from a jellyrat invasion. So we're good.

Well, I hope we are. Unless my brain has already been sucked out and I'm just telling you what they tell me to tell you.

Then hope is already lost.

I'm off to check my brain before I wreck my brain.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj