sticky money smells good

Canada has new money that smells like maple syrup! Well, that’s according to the citizens of Canada. Also known as Canadanites.

According to the official Bank of Canada, “The bank has not added any scent to the new bank notes.”

So why is everybody smelling maple syrup? Some people think it’s all psychosomatic. That people want to believe it, so they all smell maple syrup. (Is it normal to smell your money? Is that a Canadanite thing to do? Is it weird that I DON'T smell my money?)

I have another theory. Everything in Canada is made out of maple syrup. Do you remember Fraggle Rock? And the Doozers? They made all their buildings out of radishes and the Fraggles LOVED them!

Well, Canadians are like maple syrup Doozers. I mean, maple syrup is pretty much everywhere in Canada. It practically grows on trees. So the Bank of Canada (secretly) said, “Let’s use this stuff to make money!”

And make money they did!

The bad thing is that the money can melt. You may think I am making that up. I am not. Though I sometimes (almost always) fabricate the facts, this one is not fabricated at all. The money melts and gets sticky when it gets too warm. It’s best to store your money in the fridge to keep it fresh. If you put it in your wallet, it might get gooey on a hot day.

I know, this is Canada, you would never think it gets hot there. But it’s tricky because of their Celsius temperatures!

You might say, “It’s only 40 degrees out! My money won’t melt!” Then you go outside and maply syrup money is melting everywhere! Because when you convert 40 Canada into American-language, it’s 104 degrees!

I’m going to bring a bottle of maple syrup to the Bank of Canada and tell them all my money melted and they should give me new money. I’ll get a really big jug, so they’ll have to give me billions of dollars. I’ll be maple-rich!

I’m off to dance my cares away.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

anybody call for a hot straw

I've never been a fan of straws. They generally cause me some sort of injury. And if I REALLY want to drink something, then I WANT IT ALL!

Even if it is ICE COLD! (That's funny if you read my last entry. It's really not funny if you did not. Actually, it's not terribly funny either way.)

So when a friend of mine was talking about the whiteness of her teeth and worried that all the coffee she was drinking would ruin that white glow, it got me thinking. Is there a straw for hot?

YES!

There are a few companies that make straws out of GLASS! Glass that can withstand the heat of a fresh mug of coffee!

There is also a plastic straw that will tolerate temperatures over 200 degrees Fahrenheit! (That's 93.3 degrees Celsius!)

Sadly, I could not find bendy straws made of glass. Probably because glass doesn't bend. Well, it does, but if I were to bend a glass straw, it would be less of a straw and more of a stabbing device. And I don't want to drink a hot beverage with a stabbing device.

I've tried that before. It hurts.

I used to have a straw that had a bunch of loops and turns on it when I was a kid. That was awesome. You could watch the drink flow up and do all sorts of tricks to get to your mouth. It's like making liquid dance. For its destruction!

Dance for me, liquid! Dance to you DOOM!

It may be noted that I have delusions of controlling the elements. Like Captain Planet.

I'm off to combine my powers.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

a slice of american pi

I can't believe I missed this yesterday! The U.S. population was pi times 100 million!

314,159,265!!!!!!

Unfortunately, it happened at 2:29 PM yesterday. Which, is kind of a lame time. Okay, so it's not lame. It's not quite 2:30 (the time to see the dentist), but it still has something going for it!

See, 2:29 PM is also 14:29. And 1.429 IS a good number! The density of Oxygen is 1.429 g/L at 0 degrees Celsius, 101.352 kPa!

So technically, the U.S. population was Pi times 100 million at the density of Oxygen (0 degrees Celsius, 101.325kPa)!

Yesterday was a good day for being a circle. And for breathing.

Okay, EVERY day is good for being a circle and breathing! But yesterday was extra good! I think for Halloween, I'll be a breathing circle.

If people ask, "What are you supposed to be?"

I'll answer proudly, "August 14, 2012! Hashtag awesome!"

Oh yeah. That just happened.

I'm off to check my density.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj