The CIA can neither confirm nor deny the fact that they have a museum.
Well, that’s not true. They do have one. But you can’t go there. Because it’s in the CIA compound and you aren’t allowed in.
So what’s the point of the museum?! I mean, seriously! I would museum that place like crazy!
Sure it’s all online for me to see, but that’s not nearly as much fun as being there!
Apparently, the CIA also has a gift shop. Not IN the museum. Just there. For you to buy stuff.
Now, I know I’m not even close to being qualified to deal with national secrets, but I mean, couldn’t you just move all the stuff from one spot to another spot maybe outside of the CIA building? Like, just outside of the compound and put the gift shop out there, too?
I mean, if all this stuff CAN be seen, why not let people see it? And put the gift shop at the end of the museum? THAT is how you get people. You make them exit through the gift shop.
Kids love junk like that. Like baby’s first Escape & Evasion Survival Kit. Or a Civil Air Transport Notepad/Diary. Or maybe a stuffed William J. Donovan Desk so the kids can cuddle at night with memories of memos from World War II.
I know they’re all about discretion, but should the museum be one of them? I would love a selfie with a Dynazoom. Post that on Instagram #CIA #secrets #centralintelligenceagenselfie #lookoutimaspy
I wonder if they need a curator. How sweet would that job be?! Nobody can go there, so what do I have to do? Dust a few things? Sweep once a week? Run around in a U-2 helmet and scare the pants off of spies from other planets?
Oh my…I want that job so bad right now!
I’m off to check the employment opportunities at the CIA.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
Showing posts with label instagram. Show all posts
Showing posts with label instagram. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
cuttlefish instagram
Researchers at the University of Buffalo know what’s important! They have been working on making Wi-Fi available…UNDERWATER!
Ever heard of a tweeting fish? You will now!
Sorry, that was a bad joke. But you should know, most of the jokes are bad. Deal with it.
Imagine having Facebook everywhere you go! You could be on your yacht and sail for days and never have to worry about missing a post.
Just think of the selfies you could post on Instagram! “Me in the Atlantic! #oceanfun #selfie #bluewater” Or “Me in the Pacific! #selfie #beautifulday #whatsthatfinbehindme”
Granted, they’re not doing this so you can play with your phone on every inch of the world. They say there are practical reasons, too.
Mostly because Aquaman is bored and the only member of the Justice League NOT on Facebook. Partly because it could actually help with tons of research about our oceans.
Also, for safety reasons! It could help detect a tsunami or other strange underwater disasters.
Like, if you follow a shark on Twitter, you’ll know what beach to avoid. (I warned you about the jokes!)
They did say this could be used for many things like “helping law enforcement track drug traffickers to protecting the ocean’s inhabitants.”
Yep! After many years working with the DEA (not true), I know that traffickers love posting selfies WITH location services ON!
“Smooth sailing and sunny days! #selfie #hash #dealer #cuteoutfit”
He was easy to catch.
I’m off to FishFaceBook.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
Ever heard of a tweeting fish? You will now!
Sorry, that was a bad joke. But you should know, most of the jokes are bad. Deal with it.
Imagine having Facebook everywhere you go! You could be on your yacht and sail for days and never have to worry about missing a post.
Just think of the selfies you could post on Instagram! “Me in the Atlantic! #oceanfun #selfie #bluewater” Or “Me in the Pacific! #selfie #beautifulday #whatsthatfinbehindme”
Granted, they’re not doing this so you can play with your phone on every inch of the world. They say there are practical reasons, too.
Mostly because Aquaman is bored and the only member of the Justice League NOT on Facebook. Partly because it could actually help with tons of research about our oceans.
Also, for safety reasons! It could help detect a tsunami or other strange underwater disasters.
Like, if you follow a shark on Twitter, you’ll know what beach to avoid. (I warned you about the jokes!)
They did say this could be used for many things like “helping law enforcement track drug traffickers to protecting the ocean’s inhabitants.”
Yep! After many years working with the DEA (not true), I know that traffickers love posting selfies WITH location services ON!
“Smooth sailing and sunny days! #selfie #hash #dealer #cuteoutfit”
He was easy to catch.
I’m off to FishFaceBook.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
Tuesday, May 28, 2013
the computer in your hand
I saw some video a few weeks ago that has stuck in my mind. It was Newton Leroy Gingrich. You might call him Newt. Because you’re his buddy. And when you buddy with somebody, you shorten their name.
At least, that’s what I see people do on television. I don’t know what it’s like to have a buddy.
Newty Newt put out a video about his phone. His “smartphone.” He doesn’t like the name. He says that it is no more phone than it is a computer. Basically, it’s a computer that also makes phone calls. All from the palm of your hand!
And he’s absolutely right! Yeah, these things basically started out as phones, but are you really making phone calls on it?! NO! You’re playing games and looking at Facebook and taking pictures for Instagram!
It is, in fact, a device that communicates with other devices. Hence, the first name I will propose to Newton. A “Communicator.”
Just like they used in Star Trek! I think it would be a fitting homage to a show about the future that we are finally catching up to. So, if you ever ask me to text you, I will use my communicator to do it.
If you don’t like that name, I have one more to propose. “Dragon.”
You: “Could you check on the weather?”
Me: “Sure, let me just get my dragon and find out.”
You: “And then call Newton about the movies?”
Me: “Absolutely. I’ll call him with my dragon.”
You: “Also, could you attack an evil castle holding a demon wizard casting a spell of lameness over the world?”
Me: “Yep! My dragon will take care of that! With a very awesome app!”
See?! Wouldn't you look cool if you had a dragon, too?!
Or you could keep calling it a smartphone. Yawn.
I’m off to watch youtube with my dragon.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
At least, that’s what I see people do on television. I don’t know what it’s like to have a buddy.
Newty Newt put out a video about his phone. His “smartphone.” He doesn’t like the name. He says that it is no more phone than it is a computer. Basically, it’s a computer that also makes phone calls. All from the palm of your hand!
And he’s absolutely right! Yeah, these things basically started out as phones, but are you really making phone calls on it?! NO! You’re playing games and looking at Facebook and taking pictures for Instagram!
It is, in fact, a device that communicates with other devices. Hence, the first name I will propose to Newton. A “Communicator.”
Just like they used in Star Trek! I think it would be a fitting homage to a show about the future that we are finally catching up to. So, if you ever ask me to text you, I will use my communicator to do it.
If you don’t like that name, I have one more to propose. “Dragon.”
You: “Could you check on the weather?”
Me: “Sure, let me just get my dragon and find out.”
You: “And then call Newton about the movies?”
Me: “Absolutely. I’ll call him with my dragon.”
You: “Also, could you attack an evil castle holding a demon wizard casting a spell of lameness over the world?”
Me: “Yep! My dragon will take care of that! With a very awesome app!”
See?! Wouldn't you look cool if you had a dragon, too?!
Or you could keep calling it a smartphone. Yawn.
I’m off to watch youtube with my dragon.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
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