maybe I use too many words

So, the popular app right now is “Yo.” Which sends messages to your contacts. But the only message it sends is “Yo.”

Seriously. That’s it. If you haven’t heard about this, well…Yo.

Now you have.

When I write, I actually try to make it about a page. The old standard piece of paper. 8.5x11. I’m sure you’ve seen one before in a museum.

Kids, ask your parents what paper is.

Now, in the ye olden days (like, last week), if I wanted to say “Yo” to a friend, I would have to open the messaging app, tap on someone’s name, tap a "y," then an "o," then tap send. I guess a period would be in there, too.

That’s six taps! With the Yo app, you open the app and then tap a person’s name and that’s it! Two taps! That is a savings of FOUR taps!

Imagine what you could do with that time! You could Yo two more people!

The Yo people say that “Yo” can mean anything you want. It depends on the context.

I have one issue with that. THERE IS NO CONTEXT. Yo within a context of Yo only means Yo! It can mean nothing else!

Am I the only one who sees this?!

Clearly I am too verbose. I mean, I’ve used, like, 225 words so far. That's way more than two letters. When I could have just put “Yo” on the top and been done with it. The context of the Yo is CLEARLY apparent!

This has to be a joke. Maybe in a week we’ll find out that it was a clever prank on the world and I didn’t get it.

Let’s hope that happens. Soon. Please.

I’m off to yo.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

time comes to you

Why travel to the future when you can make the future come to you! A man in Tehran claims he created a kinda, sorta time machine.

It doesn't really flux capacitate. More like flux caprintout...itate...

Ali has created the "Aryayek Time Traveling Machine." It will tell you what will happen to you in the next 5-8 years of your life. Using "complex algorithms."

I will also tell you what will happen in the next 10 years of your life. Using algorithms of complexion.

Find me in 10 years and let's check on my accuracy.

Know why we don't have access to this AMAZING device yet?! He says that "the Chinese will steal the idea and produce it in millions overnight."

Which, granted, is probably true. So you can't blame the guy.

But who cares about that?! I travel in time at least twice a year! I'll go forward and backwards one FULL HOUR. It's crazy. I really can't explain it. My phone will just pop forward an hour or back an hour sometimes!

My phone is amazing! It takes pictures and plays music and texts AND takes me through time!

I may have a time travel app. I don't remember finding that at the app store, but time travel may or may not have messed up my memory.

Also, many blows to the head may or may not have messed up my intelligence. So says my anesthesiologist. Wait...no...maybe it was the neurosthesiologist?

I can't remember.

I'm off to fall back in time.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj