banana still in the peel

Somebody has invented a banana corer. I guess they wanted to make bananas more interesting. By filling them with sweetness!

I’ll try to explain. You put the unpeeled banana in the holder. Then, you put this metal thing that looks like a giant needle through the banana. You then have a small hole at the top. Then you squeeze something in there like caramel or chocolate or whipped cream.

You eat it and find a tasty surprise!

This was created in Argentina. I’m guessing they want to sell more bananas and this will make bananas more fun.

I don’t think they need to sell me on this. I eat bananas like crazy. They are already sweet and so easy to eat! Just peel and eat! Done!

I might fill my banana with peanut butter. Because I eat that almost every day. I will put some peanut butter on bread and put a banana on it. It looks kinda like a hot dog. Well…if the bun was a piece of wheat bread and the ketchup was peanut butter and the hot dog was a banana.

Ok, so it’s almost nothing like a hot dog. But it’s good! I don’t even cut the banana. THAT is how lazy I am. And you know what? I don’t care! It’s So Good. It’s like a Banana in a Blanket.

I wonder if you can inject any other fruits with caramel? I mean, you could core an apple, but the caramel center would be too hard to get to.

On the other hand, I guess they already solved that by putting the caramel or chocolate on the outside.

Strawberries and blueberries are too small to really inject with anything.

OH! What about carrots! That’s a vegetable that you could inject something into! Maybe caramel? Like caramel carrots? I wonder if that’s any good. I’ll have to try that. Carrots deserve to get banana respect.

I’m off to inject fruits and vegetables.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

cake and vegetables

Happy National Carrot Cake Day! I am eating carrot cake right now. It is so good. Do you like carrot cake? Are you sure about that?

I was convinced that I did NOT like it. If you ever asked me to have a slice of carrot cake, I would have yelled, “Cake from a carrot?! Are you kidding?! THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE!”

And out loud, I would have said, “No thanks. I don’t like carrot cake.”

Well guess what! Both the loud voice inside my head and the voice that actually makes noises from my mouth would have been incorrect!

If you know me, you might have noticed that I’ve become a fan of pumpkin-related items lately. Like pie, muffins, cookies, and seeds. I distinctly remember not liking pumpkin pie as a kid. I can’t remember if I actually tried it, but I’m pretty sure I did. I’m also pretty sure I did not enjoy it.

Well, one day, my friend gave me a pumpkin cookie and I LOVED IT! So, I decided to retry some foods.

Because, as Shakespeare said, “doth not the appetite alter?” Apparently it doth! It dothed all over the place!

Feeling love for the pumpkins, I decided to try carrot cake again. Thank the good bard I did! It’s fantastic!

I mean, I love carrots. I literally eat them every day. And that’s not a “literally” that really means “figuratively.” It’s a very literal literally. Literally.

So why aren’t there other vegetable cakes? I love broccoli and peppers. Where are they?

OH! Just looked online and found that there is a beetroot cake AND a parsnip cake!

Parsnip is a fun word. Give me a minute. I’m going to say it a bunch of times.

…

Ok, back. And ready to get my cakes from vegetables! You should too! If you haven’t tried a food for a while, give it a shot. When I said I would die before eating carrot cake, I did not think I should live till I were caked with carrots!

I’m off to butcher more Shakespeare.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

orange you glad we're tasty

Want the tastiest hot chocolate ever? Put it in an orange mug! That's all you have to do! You could make it with dirt and it would still taste good!

Well...that last part might not be true. The rest is! For no reason at all, researchers in Spain and England did a test. They put the same hot chocolate in four different colored mugs. Cream, orange, white, and red. The inside of the mugs were all white.

Then people tasted the hot chocolate and most people said that it tasted bestest coming from the orange mug!

I don't know if this works with all food, but I'm going to jump to the conclusion that it does. Therefore, I'm going to open up a restaurant called "OraNgE." I played with the shift key to make it look trendy. Because trendy places make more money. Especially ones with biggle and little letters.

My trendy restaurant will be TOTALLY ORANGE. Everything. The chairs, the tables, the plates, the silverwar...NO! Orangeware! Oh...this is going to be brilliant!

All the food will be orange too! And no, I'm not going to ONLY serve carrots and oranges. Even though those are two of my favorite foods. Wait...ah! Even the food tricked my normally keen senses! They're both orange! No wonder I love them so much!

Nature knows how to make us eat orange things! That nature is a tricky fox.

To give people more choices, I will add orange colors to all the foods there! And you will order off an orange menu!

OH! And to get in, you must wear something orange! Another rule of trendy clubs is to have some sort of dress code. That makes you seem exclusive. And exclusivity makes people think you have something specialer than it really is. Hence: trendy.

Maybe I'll have orange jackets people can wear if they forget orange clothes. Or clothes in general.

There was once a song by the Jon Spencer Blues Explosion called Orange. Actually, it was a whole album. I really loved that album. It tasted gre...AH! Orange got me again! Wow! That's some good orange!

I'm off to get orangey.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

the greatish escape

I love my neighborhood. I've only lived in a few places, but I've always been lucky. There is always something...unexpected...waiting for me.

Like a mattress on the bushes. As you know, I'm a fan of the mattress on a car. Because, as stated in an earlier blog, you take a nap on it and the car will drive you home. Or a candy store. Either is fine.

But the mattress and box spring on the bushes confuzzles me. It's those TALL bushes that people use as a fence-like property boundary thing. Privacy shrubbery.

Then, I figured it out! An escape plan! I've watched movies where people have to climb over a barbwire fence and they put something over the sharpies so they don't get hurt.

Have you ever tried to run through bushes? They're sharp! So to avoid all the blood lossery, somebody threw a mattress on the top of the bushes and climbed over!

Take that blood! You're staying in the body!

I'm not sure WHO needed to escape from that house, but I DO have a theory.

In my head, there is this dog and cat who have been working on a comedy act. It's pretty hilarious. (It is in my head, at least.) But the house has one of those laser fences that you can't see. The dog and the cat dragged the mattress (and box spring) out of the house and threw it on top of the bushes and then escaped!

Now they're on the road trying to make it big.

In my head, they make tons of money and I'm their agent. But we only talk on the phone because I'm allergic to them.

My carrots are not good today. That has nothing to do with the story in my head. It has everything to do with the carrots in my Gladware. They are gross.

I wouldn't even give them to my animal clients. Because I'm a good agent.

I'm off to shrub the yard...and buy new carrots.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj