banana still in the peel

Somebody has invented a banana corer. I guess they wanted to make bananas more interesting. By filling them with sweetness!

I’ll try to explain. You put the unpeeled banana in the holder. Then, you put this metal thing that looks like a giant needle through the banana. You then have a small hole at the top. Then you squeeze something in there like caramel or chocolate or whipped cream.

You eat it and find a tasty surprise!

This was created in Argentina. I’m guessing they want to sell more bananas and this will make bananas more fun.

I don’t think they need to sell me on this. I eat bananas like crazy. They are already sweet and so easy to eat! Just peel and eat! Done!

I might fill my banana with peanut butter. Because I eat that almost every day. I will put some peanut butter on bread and put a banana on it. It looks kinda like a hot dog. Well…if the bun was a piece of wheat bread and the ketchup was peanut butter and the hot dog was a banana.

Ok, so it’s almost nothing like a hot dog. But it’s good! I don’t even cut the banana. THAT is how lazy I am. And you know what? I don’t care! It’s So Good. It’s like a Banana in a Blanket.

I wonder if you can inject any other fruits with caramel? I mean, you could core an apple, but the caramel center would be too hard to get to.

On the other hand, I guess they already solved that by putting the caramel or chocolate on the outside.

Strawberries and blueberries are too small to really inject with anything.

OH! What about carrots! That’s a vegetable that you could inject something into! Maybe caramel? Like caramel carrots? I wonder if that’s any good. I’ll have to try that. Carrots deserve to get banana respect.

I’m off to inject fruits and vegetables.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

fruit cutter

I’m a fruit cutter and I’m proud to admit it!

I’ve been testing some new fruits lately, but I’m insanely lazy. I have no desire to cook or prepare food. I don’t know why people would want to do that. It takes so much time!

You know what you could be doing? SOMETHING FUN.

Well, I’ve been testing out my cutting skills on watermelons and pineapples. And guess what! I don’t mind it! I’m shocked that I’ve done this more than once. Seriously. Making food kills me.

Literally. I die every single time. Luckily, I come back to life right after it happens. It’s very strange. In my head, I imagine that everybody else hates it as much as I do.

Of course, some people tell me that I think differently than most people. I don’t believe them.

So yes! I cut large shelled fruit! Well…it’s not a shell. Peel? Rind, I guess? Why are there so many names for the fruit skin?

Like, there are orange and banana peels. For some reason, the watermelon has a “rind.” And it looks like the pineapple just calls it the skin.

Can’t we just have one name for all this stuff? Like, Fruit Shield? Or Fruit Wall? Or Annoying Part Keeping Me From Sweetness?

How did people even find out there was fruit inside? I mean, maybe a watermelon fell and broke open. But what is it about a pineapple that says, “Hey! Open me up for a sweet treat! I know I kinda look like a porcupine/hedgehog thing with funky hair, but I promise that you can touch me and not die!”

I still don’t completely trust them. When cutting a pineapple, I never know if they will just attack. It could happen! Pineapples could just be sitting there…waiting…and when we least expect it…Pina Colada Assault! Here’s manganese in your face!

That’s why I shoot my pineapples with an arrow first. From a safe distance. In the supermarket. Then bring it home.

I won’t be caught unawares. Sadly, I’m not allowed in most supermarkets anymore.

I’m off to skin the apple of pine.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj