banana still in the peel

Somebody has invented a banana corer. I guess they wanted to make bananas more interesting. By filling them with sweetness!

I’ll try to explain. You put the unpeeled banana in the holder. Then, you put this metal thing that looks like a giant needle through the banana. You then have a small hole at the top. Then you squeeze something in there like caramel or chocolate or whipped cream.

You eat it and find a tasty surprise!

This was created in Argentina. I’m guessing they want to sell more bananas and this will make bananas more fun.

I don’t think they need to sell me on this. I eat bananas like crazy. They are already sweet and so easy to eat! Just peel and eat! Done!

I might fill my banana with peanut butter. Because I eat that almost every day. I will put some peanut butter on bread and put a banana on it. It looks kinda like a hot dog. Well…if the bun was a piece of wheat bread and the ketchup was peanut butter and the hot dog was a banana.

Ok, so it’s almost nothing like a hot dog. But it’s good! I don’t even cut the banana. THAT is how lazy I am. And you know what? I don’t care! It’s So Good. It’s like a Banana in a Blanket.

I wonder if you can inject any other fruits with caramel? I mean, you could core an apple, but the caramel center would be too hard to get to.

On the other hand, I guess they already solved that by putting the caramel or chocolate on the outside.

Strawberries and blueberries are too small to really inject with anything.

OH! What about carrots! That’s a vegetable that you could inject something into! Maybe caramel? Like caramel carrots? I wonder if that’s any good. I’ll have to try that. Carrots deserve to get banana respect.

I’m off to inject fruits and vegetables.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

foresight activation

Hershey’s is looking to hire a Senior Manager in “Foresight Activation.” Somebody who can see what trends will be happening in the future and make sure that Hershey acts on those trends.

They should hire me. President Hershey, this is my resume.

I see people eating chocolate bars. That is the trend. I will act on that trend by eating a chocolate bar.

The end.

Hire me.

Still not convinced?! Looking for something a little more radical? Okay, Hershey, try THIS on!

Think about how you get a TV show. It’s just info over the air. The same with Wi-Fi at home. Data just going through you.

Well! How about doing the same thing with chocolate bars! I was thinking of calling it Wonkavision. Or Wo-Fi.

That might not be legal. So, how about Hershyvision! And He-Fi!

If that’s not enough to convince you, here’s my last idea.

Put stuff in chocolate bars. Not just peanuts and caramel. Do a full-on nut bar! With peanuts, cashews, almonds, hazelnuts, and walnuts! Make it BIG.

Or do a seed bar with pumpkin seeds and sunflower seeds!

Put in caramel and chocolate goo and gummy bears and popcorn and waffles and honey and maple syrup! You can even do it with the Kisses. Put a gummy bear in each one!

This is what the people want!

Now hire me.

I’m off work my activision.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

the final say on candy corn

There is no guarantee that this is actually the last time I will write about candy corn.

But it could be.

I tried all the new candies and cookies that have been created to TASTE like candy corn.

And they were good.

I decided to give candy corn another chance. I never used to like it. It was always...not right.

I have changed my mind. I now like it! It's good! I don't know if they changed anything, but the bag does say that it is made with "real honey." And, well, you know how passionate I am about honey!

I have a theory about the "bad" candy corn. People put it in a dish and it sits out and gets dry and nasty. THAT is when it is gross! And THAT might be why I never liked it!

So keep it fresh in the bag so kids don't get scarred like I did!

AND NOW they make different flavors! They have original, which I guess is honey-flavor, caramel, AND caramel apple! They also have a nondescript-flavor pumpkin!

Apparently, Canada is rumoured to have a Blueberry Cobbler Candy Corn. I have NO idea what compelled the Canadians to make that, but I love them for it. And if you know any Canadian candy smugglers, I am willing to pay top dollar for a bag of that.

Legally speaking, I didn't just ask that. (Even though I really did. Shhhh...)

Candy corn, I apologize for treating you so badly for so long. I hope we can get along now. And by get along, I mean I will buy many bags of you and eat like crazy.

I'm off to visit a...friend...at the border.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj