the sprouts are outs

So I tried some Brussels sprouts the other day. It was a frozen meal. It was sprouts with butter.

It was…ok. I haven’t had Brussels sprouts very often. I had them a few years ago and they were good. I don’t remember the recipe, but it was not microwaved from a box.

As I was eating these leafy greens and watching My Little Pony, I thought about the name. Why are they called Brussels sprouts? Does it have to do with the actual city of Brussels?

YES! It does! I guess that’s where they started growing them a lot and the name just stuck!

Should they be possessive? Like, Brussels’ sprouts? Showing Brusselseses ownership of them?

Whoa! Did you know that there is a mathematical game called sprouts? And there is a variation called Brussels Sprouts?!

It’s true! You have to use a pencil to play. And paper. It’s probably fun for mathematicians. It involves dots and lines. Euler is mentioned in there. And you know what they say in math, “Nothing’s cooler than Euler!” (It's math...it doesn't have to rhyme.)

Am I the only one here getting excited about Mathematical Vegetables?! (That would be a good band name.)

I bet the game is as fun as the vegetable tastes. Maybe if they put butter on the pencil and paper, it would be slightly better.

Didn’t work for the vegetable, but you know, Math Butter. (Also a good band name.)

I’m not sure what that is, but it sounds gross.

Unless Fabio was selling it to me. “I can’t believe it’s not math.”

I’m off to butter my logarithm.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

veggies and cereal

I love experimenting with food. Some people think I’m picky. I’m not really. I test a lot of stuff out, then find one thing I REALLY like, then only eat that forever.

That’s not weird or anything.

I love to keep food simple! I don’t like spending a lot of time on it. I’ll often microwave frozen veggies, put some spices on them (I have a big collection of spices), and enjoy a flavorful feast!

My latest experiment involved cereal! I have no idea HOW I thought of this, but I did.

Actually, here’s what probably happened. I got excited about a new food and couldn’t wait to try it. I made the decision to eat it after something else was already made. Thus, veggies and cereal was born!

I bought a box of Mallow Oats. I know, you have NO idea what that is. I shop in the “Natural and Organic” section of the supermarket. There’s a company called “Mom’s Best.” Mallow Oats are basically Lucky Charms. But made using wind energy or something.

I was very excited to try my sugared-by-nature cereal, but already put some veggies in the microwave. Then, the wind energy powered light bulb went off over my head!

Put the cereal in the veggies! I mean, adding sweetness to veggies can’t be a bad idea, right?

Turns out, I WAS right! It’s really good! I know you think it’s gross, but it’s really not! Trust me! I tried it more than once just to be sure. I have confirmed its super-tastiness.

I also tried it with Mom’s Best version of Frosted Mini-Wheats. It wasn’t bad, but not as fun. That is all I have done at this point, but I have a feeling that some sort of Cinnamon cereal or Frosted Flakey cereal would also taste good.

OH! Maybe even some sort of Coco cereal!

Know why? The sugar! Natural or unnatural! You should try it! DO IT!

If you DO try it, let me know what’s good!

I’m off to cereal my veggies.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

clean teeth at the gym

Do you know anybody who walks around and does stuff while chewing on a toothpick? I think I’ve seen it in movies. Maybe some sort of old gangster movie where one guy is chewing on a toothpick holding a tommy gun.

Well, I was at the gym and some guy was chewing on a toothpick. No joke. This really happened. It was just sitting while he used the weight machines.

Is this safe? Aren’t those pointy? I guess if he wants to chew on a toothpick, that’s cool.

I mean, I seriously only thought it happened in old movies! I never thought somebody actually did it in real life! But they do! At least, this guy does at the gym!

I think it’s supposed to make you look tough. (He looked tough. With or without a toothpick.) I’m not sure. I only think of dental hygiene when I see it.

Trust me, I’m all about keeping the gunk out of my teeth spaces! I floss about 10 times a day! Seriously, I do. Maybe this guy and I would have a lot of teeth stories to share.

We could sit down at a restaurant and eat vegetables with parsley. Then we could go look in a mirror and check our teeth! Once the flossing and toothpicking was all done, we’d laugh and laugh at everyone who didn’t have spotless toothees!

Oh the fun we’d have!

I’d like to become a toothpick chewer. I think it’s a look that would work on me. Of course, I like to think all looks work on me, which is why I’m wearing a cape and cowboy boots. Because I can pull it off.

Now imagine the cape and cowboy boots with a toothpick.

I understand...you need a minute to collect yourself because the awesomeness just made your mind explode a little bit.

Please, feel free to dress the same way. I don’t mind if we both look amazetastic.

I’m off to pick a tooth.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

in the mood for food that's good

Make sure you say "good" like "food" and "mood." It's funner that way.

I sometimes think that I should start my own food blog. Not that anyone reads my non-food blog. And not that anyone likes any of the food choices I make. But, I do often write about my adventures in fooding because every new food experience is an adventure!

Sometimes it ends with a new favorite food. Other times...well...my tummy doesn't like me so much and questions my decisions.

I DID try some new things recently that I encourage you all to do. Today. And again tomorrow.

Apples and hummus! Not just ANY hummus. SUPER HUMMUS! I found this stuff the other day because I was looking to get into hummus. I know I've had it before and I've always liked it, but I never really kept up with it. We casually hung out, but I wanted to make us a little more BFFy. Luckily, I found Super Hummus.

I like to think that if Superman or The Hulk or Wolverine had a hankerin' for hummus, they would eat Super Hummus. Therefore, since I'm part super, I had to buy Super Hummus.

Now that I AM a regular hummuser, I decided to go off the vegetable path and try it with an apple. Bear with me, it gets a little complicated here. It tasted good...after the first few slices. See, the apple had to dry a little before it was good. It started too juicy and that didn't work well with the hummus.

As you may or may not know, I've been experimenting with peanut butter and honey. I love the combination of the two. I also love cinnamon. The word and the spice. One of my favorite things to say is "cinnamon in it."

Go ahead. Say it really fast. Fun, isn't it! I can't stop saying it! Cinnamoninit!

Now I CAN say it all the time! My mom suggested some honey AND cinnamon AND peanut butter on toast. Four of my favorite things combined! My mom is a genius. It is amazing!

And now, if I ever have company that wants a snack, I will make this for them. Wanna know why? I'll show you...

You/Guest: "This is great! How did you get toast to taste so fun?"

Me: "It has cinnamon in it!"

You/Guest: "CINNAMONINIT!"

As a bonus, I just found out that "Toast To Taste" is also really fun to say.

I'm off to toast to taste cinnamon in it.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

crazy maizey candy corn

Candy corn is back on my  mind!

It's Candy Corn Day! That means you get to celebrate everything candy corn!

All flavors! Well...all the good ones, at least.

Turns out, when they first made candy corn in the 1890s, they thought making other vegetables into candy would be a good idea.

And let me tell you. IT IS!

They made candy turnips. They did not sell. I don't know why. Turnips are actually kinda pretty. That purple/white thing they got going on? It's tasty looking! Just imagine it as a candy!

What about a candy radish?! Or a candy cauliflower?!

Ingredients: Sugar. Shape: Vegetable.

If every vegetable was a sugar, I would eat a lot more vegetables and a lot less candy.

So really, this would be healthy for me. And you. And for America!

Let's get these other candy vegetables back!

I would eat so many vegetables that I might die. From being so healthy.

And death by turnip is NOT a bad way to go. (Somebody might get that.)

I'm off to buy more candy corn. Again.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

combine them all for easy use

I found a beverage that has a COMBINED serving of fruit and vegetables. Legally, I am supposed to have 2 cups of fruit and 3 cups of vegetables every day. 

If I do not, I get slapped by a cruciferous vegetable.

Cruciferous always makes me think iron is having a bad day. Luckily, every time we're missing an r, iron lives another day!

No, not because it's ion. This is more of a chemistry joke than an electron joke.

It's funny...really...well, I mean, if I have to explain it, it's not funny. Just trust me, somebody will like it!

So, in theory, we need 5 servings of both during the day. This beverage counts as one COMBINED serving. So...I guess...half of each?

I have no idea how to follow the servings rule after that. Therefore, we need a new system. ALL fruits and veggies will be combined!

Now you can enjoy some yummy garlemons! Maybe throw some carricots in your salad! Or snack on some zuccananas!

This makes life so much easier! Have 5 fruiggies in the day and you can avoid a slapping!

...

You're still annoyed by my joke earlier, aren't you. Look, don't blame me for the confusion. Blame Faraday! If he didn't start using the term "ion" when he was playing with electrodes, it would have died with the Greeks and we wouldn't even THINK that's what I meant by the missing r! We would just have to worry about the Latin root for ferrous!

This would be so much easier if I knew how to make sense.

I'm off to drink a fruiggie.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj