they see what we're doing

Your plants are watching you. Don't look at them! You don't want them to know that you know that they see you. 

Some research shows that plants can "see" things. They can't see what we see because plants don't have eyes. But their leaves and stems and stuff are watching you. Right. Now.

Creepy, right?! And we just LET these things into our homes to watch us!

Upon reading this, I stopped bringing my fern into the shower with me every morning. It now sits in my closet under a pile of clothes so it can't see anything.

I'm thinking of planting it outside, but I'm afraid it will grow tall enough to peek into my window. Like that tree across the street. I know what those leaves are looking at. And I don't like it.

I called the police about the tree staring into my window, but they didn't do anything about it.

Well, they did something, but it wasn't what I was hoping. It was less "arresting the tree" and more "laughing at me and telling me to stop calling."

So, I yelled at the tree to stop staring at me. My neighbor didn't like that. The cops may or may not have been involved again.

Let that be a lesson to you. Plants are watching. They may be plotting. I know they've been around for millions of years, but that's just to make us think we're safe. When we are least expecting it, they'll attack.

Or have they already...

Dun Dun Duuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!!!

I'm off to photosynthesize.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj