time comes to you

Why travel to the future when you can make the future come to you! A man in Tehran claims he created a kinda, sorta time machine.

It doesn't really flux capacitate. More like flux caprintout...itate...

Ali has created the "Aryayek Time Traveling Machine." It will tell you what will happen to you in the next 5-8 years of your life. Using "complex algorithms."

I will also tell you what will happen in the next 10 years of your life. Using algorithms of complexion.

Find me in 10 years and let's check on my accuracy.

Know why we don't have access to this AMAZING device yet?! He says that "the Chinese will steal the idea and produce it in millions overnight."

Which, granted, is probably true. So you can't blame the guy.

But who cares about that?! I travel in time at least twice a year! I'll go forward and backwards one FULL HOUR. It's crazy. I really can't explain it. My phone will just pop forward an hour or back an hour sometimes!

My phone is amazing! It takes pictures and plays music and texts AND takes me through time!

I may have a time travel app. I don't remember finding that at the app store, but time travel may or may not have messed up my memory.

Also, many blows to the head may or may not have messed up my intelligence. So says my anesthesiologist. Wait...no...maybe it was the neurosthesiologist?

I can't remember.

I'm off to fall back in time.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj