White House Press Secretary Jay Carney has decided not to secrete the press anymore. This may not be a huge deal to you. But it is to me because I always wanted to cosplay as Jay Carney.
For those who don’t know, cosplay is when you dress up as somebody else. Like people who dress up as Spider-Man at a comic book convention. That’s cosplay.
So why Jay Carney? Because I could totally pull it off! And political cosplay is one of my 17 favorite kinds of cosplay on my list of “Favorite Cosplay Themes.”
It’s also super easy! I wear glasses and own a suit! Done! Super Carney to the rescue!
Ok. Maybe I would make my Jay a little more comic booky than he already is. But still.
I would also press a lot of things. Like benches and printings. Because I would be a Press Secretary.
A lot of people don’t like the word “secretary” these days. I wonder why? I mean, Press Secretary is a pretty impressive job! You talk for the President!
And the Secretary of State deals with foreign policy all the time. That Kerry guy is always going to different places to make world peace!
Some people say, “I’d rather be called an Administrative Assistant instead of a Secretary.”
Really? But secretaries are creating world peace!
Maybe it’s because these White House secretaries have other titles with them. Maybe secretaries should have more specific names at businesses. Like Secretary of Awesome. Or Ninja Secretary.
Or Ninja Secretary of Awesome.
Oh…wait…I think I have a new title at work! I need to get that on my business card!
If only I was important enough to get a business card.
I’m off to make world peace as the Ninja Secretary of Awesome!
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
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