Thursday, August 28, 2014

now you’re cooking with a dry heat

A friend of mine was making roast beef. I know this because she texted me a picture of it. I actually find this very exciting because I had no idea she could roast anything. Not that I didn’t have faith in her roasting abilities, but I just never saw her do it before.

But she totally ROASTED that beef!

These are the conversations I have with my friends. And I love them! When she told me about the beef roasting, I replied that I honestly had no idea what roasting meant.

I don’t cook. Ever. I have no patience for it. I make toast. I told her I could probably make toast beef. She suggested I do not do that.

But why not? It’s the same basic idea! I looked it up online! Roasting is just putting meat in a dry heat! Not only meat, but root vegetables can be roasted as well. (According to Wikipedia.)

Why can’t I just buy some yams and slice them up and put them in the toaster? Maybe grab a few slices of bologna and put them in there as well?

I know. That’s just silly. A toaster wouldn’t work because of the angle of input. You can’t put sliced meat in a toaster that way. Gravity would get in the way and it would probably just get all folded up on the bottom and possibly clog the toaster.

But, seeing as I’m a practical man, I would use a toaster OVEN.

My toaster oven even came with a little tray. I could probably just put everything on the tray and push the button and I would have a roasted/toasted dinner in just a few minutes!

I’m sure I could roast other things. Beef is kinda boring. I might roast an apple. Or a banana. Maybe some almonds. OH! People roast chestnuts!

An open fire is pretty much the same thing as a toaster oven!

Golly…my holiday parties are going to be the best.

I’m off to toast some sliced meat.

Enjoy Everything.

-dj

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