Apparently there are olfactory sensors on your skin. So when you stink after a vigorous workout at the gym, your whole body smells how funky you are!
If you are interested in smelling the pineapple at the store, just start rubbing it on your arm.
Or if you smell some cookies and want to get a good whiff, just go to the counter of the bakery and start rubbing the cookies on your stomach.
It’s not weird at all if you do that because that’s how it works.
Maybe not EXACTLY like that, but you get the idea. I guess a scientist in Germany decided to look at what your skin’s sense of smell could actually do, so he got some skin cells and some different scents and got to smelling!
Turns out sandalwood worked wonders! The scent helped the skin to heal!
Well, not sandalwood exactly, but Sandalore, which is used in sandalwood candles.
Sandalore! That’s fun to say. It sounds like a mythical city off the coast of a warm island where everybody wears sandals.
Mythical Leader: “Welcome to Sandalore, my friend! You found our hidden city in the sea! Here is your strappy, breathable footwear!”
Me: “I much prefer sneakers.”
Mythical Leader: “YOU ARE BANISHED FOREVER! Go find Shangri-La!”
I guess getting a sandalwood candle won’t heal all your wounds, though. They used concentrations about 1,000 times stronger than your average candle.
But maybe next time I’m sick, I’ll buy 1,000 sandalwood candles and light them all in my apartment. I’m sure I’ll be healthy in minutes!
Unless the smoke causes an issue. They didn’t do a study on that.
I’m off to buy out Yankee Candle.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
Showing posts with label skin. Show all posts
Showing posts with label skin. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 16, 2014
Friday, June 27, 2014
fruit cutter
I’m a fruit cutter and I’m proud to admit it!
I’ve been testing some new fruits lately, but I’m insanely lazy. I have no desire to cook or prepare food. I don’t know why people would want to do that. It takes so much time!
You know what you could be doing? SOMETHING FUN.
Well, I’ve been testing out my cutting skills on watermelons and pineapples. And guess what! I don’t mind it! I’m shocked that I’ve done this more than once. Seriously. Making food kills me.
Literally. I die every single time. Luckily, I come back to life right after it happens. It’s very strange. In my head, I imagine that everybody else hates it as much as I do.
Of course, some people tell me that I think differently than most people. I don’t believe them.
So yes! I cut large shelled fruit! Well…it’s not a shell. Peel? Rind, I guess? Why are there so many names for the fruit skin?
Like, there are orange and banana peels. For some reason, the watermelon has a “rind.” And it looks like the pineapple just calls it the skin.
Can’t we just have one name for all this stuff? Like, Fruit Shield? Or Fruit Wall? Or Annoying Part Keeping Me From Sweetness?
How did people even find out there was fruit inside? I mean, maybe a watermelon fell and broke open. But what is it about a pineapple that says, “Hey! Open me up for a sweet treat! I know I kinda look like a porcupine/hedgehog thing with funky hair, but I promise that you can touch me and not die!”
I still don’t completely trust them. When cutting a pineapple, I never know if they will just attack. It could happen! Pineapples could just be sitting there…waiting…and when we least expect it…Pina Colada Assault! Here’s manganese in your face!
That’s why I shoot my pineapples with an arrow first. From a safe distance. In the supermarket. Then bring it home.
I won’t be caught unawares. Sadly, I’m not allowed in most supermarkets anymore.
I’m off to skin the apple of pine.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
I’ve been testing some new fruits lately, but I’m insanely lazy. I have no desire to cook or prepare food. I don’t know why people would want to do that. It takes so much time!
You know what you could be doing? SOMETHING FUN.
Well, I’ve been testing out my cutting skills on watermelons and pineapples. And guess what! I don’t mind it! I’m shocked that I’ve done this more than once. Seriously. Making food kills me.
Literally. I die every single time. Luckily, I come back to life right after it happens. It’s very strange. In my head, I imagine that everybody else hates it as much as I do.
Of course, some people tell me that I think differently than most people. I don’t believe them.
So yes! I cut large shelled fruit! Well…it’s not a shell. Peel? Rind, I guess? Why are there so many names for the fruit skin?
Like, there are orange and banana peels. For some reason, the watermelon has a “rind.” And it looks like the pineapple just calls it the skin.
Can’t we just have one name for all this stuff? Like, Fruit Shield? Or Fruit Wall? Or Annoying Part Keeping Me From Sweetness?
How did people even find out there was fruit inside? I mean, maybe a watermelon fell and broke open. But what is it about a pineapple that says, “Hey! Open me up for a sweet treat! I know I kinda look like a porcupine/hedgehog thing with funky hair, but I promise that you can touch me and not die!”
I still don’t completely trust them. When cutting a pineapple, I never know if they will just attack. It could happen! Pineapples could just be sitting there…waiting…and when we least expect it…Pina Colada Assault! Here’s manganese in your face!
That’s why I shoot my pineapples with an arrow first. From a safe distance. In the supermarket. Then bring it home.
I won’t be caught unawares. Sadly, I’m not allowed in most supermarkets anymore.
I’m off to skin the apple of pine.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
hug a slug
The medical world is ready to slug you! Well, not slug you, but slug glue you.
Did you know that the goo that slugs (or terrestrial gastropod mollusks) slide around on could replace your stitches? Yep! They have found that the slug goo will seal your wounds AND move with your skin!
That means no more stitches or scars!
It also means a carnivorous slug might attack you! It’s true! There are carnivorous terrestrial gastropod mollusks! And they hunt by following a slime trail. You get slugness on you, then you become part of that trail. Hopefully you don’t bump into any giant, mutant carnivorous slugs after getting a large wound.
There is also the chance that another slug will ask you out on a date! Which is, I think, slightly better than getting eaten by a slug. Slugs will follow the slime trail of the same species of slug and see if they’re interested in a date.
These are all very real possibilities when it comes to a slug life.
Actually, the biology professor who is studying this has “SLUG LIFE” tattooed on his knuckles. Because he’s cool like that.
I wonder what it would be like if people had to secrete goo to live. I mean, I’ve had a runny nose before, but I don’t think that’s the same thing.
Still, I’ve been really sick and have had some REALLY gross nose adventures! I’m sure you want to hear all about them some day!
Wait…does that mean that there are slugs in my head? When I’m sick, I must have a carnivorous slug trying to eat my brain!
Then it will take over my mind and make me do ungastropodal things! Like…hold things with an opposable thumb!
Or maybe I’m already in the slugs clutches...(dramatic pause)
If I blow my nose, don’t come near me. Save yourself! It’s already too late for me!
I’m off to follow the slime trail.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
Did you know that the goo that slugs (or terrestrial gastropod mollusks) slide around on could replace your stitches? Yep! They have found that the slug goo will seal your wounds AND move with your skin!
That means no more stitches or scars!
It also means a carnivorous slug might attack you! It’s true! There are carnivorous terrestrial gastropod mollusks! And they hunt by following a slime trail. You get slugness on you, then you become part of that trail. Hopefully you don’t bump into any giant, mutant carnivorous slugs after getting a large wound.
There is also the chance that another slug will ask you out on a date! Which is, I think, slightly better than getting eaten by a slug. Slugs will follow the slime trail of the same species of slug and see if they’re interested in a date.
These are all very real possibilities when it comes to a slug life.
Actually, the biology professor who is studying this has “SLUG LIFE” tattooed on his knuckles. Because he’s cool like that.
I wonder what it would be like if people had to secrete goo to live. I mean, I’ve had a runny nose before, but I don’t think that’s the same thing.
Still, I’ve been really sick and have had some REALLY gross nose adventures! I’m sure you want to hear all about them some day!
Wait…does that mean that there are slugs in my head? When I’m sick, I must have a carnivorous slug trying to eat my brain!
Then it will take over my mind and make me do ungastropodal things! Like…hold things with an opposable thumb!
Or maybe I’m already in the slugs clutches...(dramatic pause)
If I blow my nose, don’t come near me. Save yourself! It’s already too late for me!
I’m off to follow the slime trail.
Enjoy Everything.
-dj
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